AFS - ONLY BEER CAN SAVE US NOW

And YET MORE punk rock quality from the prolific musical minds of AFS. This 9 track offering is a quintessential piece of seemingly spontaneous quality and blends a pleasing mixture of live and studio performances.

The first 4 tracks are indeed live and reflect the bands ability in the flesh. The talent is simply blatant and yet stripped so close to the bone so as to make it as raw as a freshly peeled testicle. This is a classic reflection of the band on stage and anyone with an inkling of nouse should be pricked into checking this lot out.

The studio recordings are as expected, brilliant. Again the no nonsense approach is adopted with accomplished ease as each track is skilfully delivered. 'Architecture of Life', 'Nobodies' and the hidden bastardised version of 'Buffalo Soldier' are personal faves but in brutal honesty there isn't one lame duck amongst this flock of pristeen swans.

Once again AFS come up trumps with an album that exhibits what a fuckin' good band this lot are. Each and every track of this mini-album is swift and to the point and doesn't waste fuckin' around with unnecessary glamorous riffs and pretentious solo's. This is a must purchase for punk purists and hopefully will go someway to confirming the punk rock hound is still bursting with life! Give this bitch a bone!

A split salt and pepper CD here with punk covered from two contrasting styles that come together to compliment each other perfectly. Crouch Mog provide the modern day technical American vibes with several ditty's that display their all round versatility and musical prowess. Fast, complex and with a classy composure the Mogs contributions are equal to anything around of this style and surely must make some kind of significant breakthrough very soon. 'Buddha' is the highlight of a quality contribution.

Kings of old style anthems AFS have once again come up trumps with their archetypical sound that is simple, instantly catchy and to the point. It is the no-nonsense approach, great catchy guitar riffs and recognisable vocal outpourings that make AFS a step above most bands of this musical mode and once again this lot must reap the rewards of a so far almost faultless CD chronology. 'Wouldn't Wanna Be You' is the highlight here as it embraces the whole AFS sound with a retro feel hard to surpass.

In truth for a split release this is surely a winner with both bands currently producing recordings and performances of a high standard. A veritable minor classic that any self respecting punk should buy

A Noize Anoize production here of the highest order with old timers Boredom displaying to the young guns how things should be done. Crystal clear production combined with the excellent choice of songs makes this the labels best CD to date and certainly establishes the DIY ethic has something that need not end up in a rushed, under produced bag of un-listenable shite. From first to last this is of an excellent standard with a superb showcase of musicianship to be savoured. 'Low Life' begins and offers much and the promise is soon fulfilled as 'Robbie Says' and 'Last Call' maintain the demos well crafted output. 'Conversations' has a slight retro feel to it with a little Oi for good measure but again is so well produced it transcends the years both ways. Finally 'What's She Got' ends a quintet of catchy tunes produced by a band who quite obviously place emphasis on good musicianship and attention to deal. In this instance the formula pays off.

For aficionados of retro punk and Benny Hill then this is a classic. Songs about things we all think, do, feel and can have a laugh to this 17 track album is Paul's full length debut and makes you wonder why the long wait? 'Jessica The Checkout Girl', 'Don't Fall In Love' and 'Sarah' are the pick of the first few tracks with the country and western 'Bert the Ladyboy' a peach. The use of the word 'Knockers' is postcard humour in its lewdest glory and the rest of the CD smacks of a comedic era, sadly long lost. Here we have dittys that give a nice two fingered salute to the PC pricks of today and personally - I love it. 'Gob On Your Granny' and 'Cause I Had Speed' are my own faves in a compendium of rough and ready crackers. Don't be fooled by the tone of this CD though because here we have a talented chappie who knows the punk scene and what it's all about and that's always an added bonus. Comparisons with TV Smith and Patrick Fitzgerald are obviously going to be made but in my opinion its unwarranted because this is an individual outpouring in its own right. Anyone looking for some honest punk that puts a smile on your face must get this CD - anyone too cultured for this kind of down to earth music - well just fuck off. Verdict - knockers, boobs and waps! Know what I mean?

DISCHARGE – BEGINNING OF THE END

A 3 track assault here with hardcore angst the order of the day.  Quite simply this is a typical Discharge outpouring with the usual fast pace and snarling lyrical rage.  ‘Beginning of the End’ opens proceedings and in truth is a great number as are ‘The Blood of the Innocent’ and ‘They Lie, You Die’ which make up a great little CD.  The only criticism is in the fact that this is nothing different and fails to open up any new horizons for a more than capable band.  Fans will love it as will lots of other hardcore die-hards but surely Discharge should be beyond this.

Verdict – very good but I expect more (fussy bugger or what)

SPIT AND SAWDUST - COMPILATION

The name says it all and if you haven't been to a gig then shame on you. All the tours faves are on this excellently compiled CD which reflects the quintessential DIY ethos that Fungalpunk/OMD and Noize Anoize Andy are trying to promote. For £3 there is no excuse not to purchase this quality piece of punk rung merchandise and get back to the true spirit of a genre long neglected.

SECTION 5 – WE STAND ALONE

Tuck in your bollocks here and brace yourself because this man’s man CD is a must for all testosterone fuelled ‘erberts who like straight talking and beer fuelled music.  ‘We Stand Alone’ opens up proceedings and sets the tone for a good sing-a-long album that seems destined to become a drunkard’s favourite.  ‘Fuck Your Politics’, ‘No Politics Here’ are quintessentially punk and the excellently chorused ‘Shakin’ hits the pogoing spot every time.

For me the best is the arse kicking and irresponsible ‘Binge Drinking’ (proper punk defiance) and the superb ‘The Hunt’.  Classic pace that is well delivered and lyrically bouncy and in yer face.  The 2 weak tracks are ‘Don’t Wanna Be Like You’ and ‘ We Shall Rise Again’ which I feel plod on far too long and break up the tempo of a very good album.  We picky twats are a strange breed but honest nonetheless. 

Other highs are ‘Sex, Beer and Sausage Rolls’ (the title says it all) and the surprisingly good ‘What You Didn’t Realise’ that shows a side to Section 5 too little seen.

A well produced album here and worth a try by anyone.  Followers should love it and I’m sure new fans should be attracted on evidence like this.  If not – fuck em’.

3CR – FUCKING DO IT

‘Fuckin do it’ is 3CR’s latest offering and once again plunges us into the deviant depths of sexualised irresponsibility.  This semen soaked CD reinforces the fact that 3CR seem obsessed with producing a certain style of under the counter filth all Benny Hill aficionados would be pleased to purchase. 

Anyway the CD kicks off with the excellent ‘S.U.V.’ that has a poke at all fat gutted wannabe yanks who compensate for their small nobs by driving a big all terrain lob lorry.  ‘Preacher Punk’ maintains a nice edge and ‘She Bummed Me’ is surely an anthem for all cross-eyed inbreeds everywhere.

Other highs are ‘Fuckin do it’ (lyrically ludicrous) and the re-vamped ‘Porno Star’ (rather polished) with ‘I Fell in love with a Minger’ which sounds very well produced.

My personal lows are ‘Columbo’ which is basically a great visual song that doesn’t transcend onto CD and ‘Fuck-Wit Davies’ which is a great song but is a cheap contradiction to the whole CD.  The only other flaw is ‘Fish Face’ which is shit.

Overall this is 3CR’s best CD to date and displays some good musical insight which is sometimes overlooked by the bands lunatic lyrics.   Maybe surprisingly the best songs are the ones that remain orally and anally void and stick with saying something.

Definitely one for all 3CR fans and for fully paid up members of the masturbation club and other tadge obsessed ‘erberts.

CHURCHILL - NO ONE LIKES US

The first release on the Noize Anoize/Fungalpunk split label this is a cracker. The band in question are growing in ability, confidence and general presence all the time and this genuine debut encapsulates what Churchill are all about. Street music with lyrics about life in general. No politics, no frills and no nonsense this excellently produced 5 track EP does the business and is instantly catchy. ‘Streets of Fear’ and the title track ‘No One Likes Us’ are my personal pick out of a quintet of quality. With more releases in the pipeline for both band and label the future looks rosy.

4 PAST MIDNIGHT - GUILTY AS CHARGED

A band disillusioned with the fucked up fractured scene that Britain has become the 4PM crew are digging in their tartan heels and getting stuck in again. I personally hope they do well because this is a smart little outfit who tear it up wherever they play. Punk needs bands like this but the watering down of actual punk rock gigs has taken its toll and this style of band gets overlooked far too often for flimsier crap that masquerades as punk but is in fact nothing of the sort. 4 Past Midnight have some strong tracks in their armoury and on this latest CD there is a lot more added firepower.

From 1st to last the energy is high, the hatred obvious and the venom virulent. Vocalist Pete tears tonsils as he rages about this, that and t'other. It will be interesting to see how the lads get on in this apathetic pot of toss and if there is any justice they will be doing more than alright.

Machine gun grind eases in before the rabble rousing yell of 'Let's Go' gets even the most doped up punker standing to attention. Immediately 4PM have us by the short and curlies and if this is melodic sadomasochism, then squeeze harder. A class, barnstorming commencement followed by the slightly hectic 'Shit'. Raucous, rabid and riot invoking - quality aggression and rhythm all blended to make a nasty brew. It'll do for me! 'Fuck Them All' next and with a title like that you get the gist. This is a pogoing piece that will have many a sweating crowd sporadically joining in with the more obvious one line proclamations. This is darn decent stuff and people who know me know I prefer punk that is as rusty as fuck and without any pretentious trimmings. 'Out of Time' certainly isn't that and the focus and hard-energy drive is as impressive as ever and really hits the mark. Gritty indeed as is the opening verbals of 'Going Underground'. A strong number and making the first five songs as impressive a line-up as you could wish for.

What I like here is the fact that this music is what it is and never tries to be anything different, anything with subliminal intent. It's up front, all blatant and very spirited.

Next we have a follow up song which is in fact is quite unusual. You think more double ditty's would be done more often but alas no, so this one was eagerly anticipated after the initial '4PM Crew' was a right old sing-a-long classic. '4PM Crew Part 2' is slightly slower paced than its predecessor and thus has a different impact. The aggression is less gung-ho and more subtle as is the overall composition. This doesn't though alter the fact that it is another 'join-in and jig' gem that displays a more cultured side to this outfit. 'Waste Away' reignites the turbo and I really like this one. The first spin can be the most crucial sometimes and during those initial revolutions some songs instantly grab you by the throat and demand the attention. This song does that and with the speed of light tumble towards the final blast it really does keep you on your toes all the way. 'Solution Is War' is more hectic but I think it works ideally, especially after the previous track and it just adds another gear change as well as upholding the violent noise. The almost frantic epilepsy becomes melody threatening, but these guys breath healthy life into the writhing discordance and the song survives. 'Glasgow' rolls in and pays homage to a town full of characters and colour. No shame, no blame and honesty all the way. The tartan is flown here with all the bands might and what a catchy tune they dish out. Scotsmen everywhere will love this one and get the McEwen’s Export in because this is surely the boozing high of the album.

'No Feelings' is a tuneful beauty - great verse, great chorus and forgive me if I am wrong but I feel there is some comparison to be made here with some very early Oi. In fact Mickey Fitz could easily put his gob to this one. Mid-paced and delivered perfectly the standard hits a new high and 'All Your Heroes' continues in impressive style with an equal dosage of melody and Oi-esque infection. Another fantastic song and this brace of belters is a pair to admire just like...well before it gets too vulgar you decide! 'Dead End Street' is a grimy hovel triumph that comes straight from where the punk spirit is borne - the gutter. Sometimes we punks may be down, we may be out but we still keep on trying. The quick tempo of this song and genuine heartfelt struggle it relates is true punk at it's best and if you don't like it then where the fuck's yer head at. Will I hear a better continuous trio of songs this year - the chances are - NOT!

'Progress' is the most regulated track on the CD that is good enough but fails to shine because of its brilliant comrades. A ship steadying surge that opens the floodgates for the crazed explosion that is 'Fits Of Rage'. The CD needed a moment like this and this is timed to a tee with the nasty noise proving the incessant rampage is far from over. Cascading drums and buzz saw guitar do damage unlimited and the fact that it precedes a gentle acoustic opening to the next song only enhances the brutality. The next and last song is entitled 'Gordon' and is about, yes you guessed it' that useless Prime Minister of ours - the babbling Mr Brown. The start I am unsure of but when the song eventually kicks in it is with great gusto and energy and rounds off 4PM's best CD to date. Hey and if this ain't enough you get one extra bonus track which is a punked up version of The Ramones' classic 'Pinhead'. It is a rip-roaring effort that brings the ditty up to date and shows how the punk rage has increased over the years.

It will be interesting to see the 4PM Crew in action as it is virtually a completely different line-up. The quality is there on disc and on this evidence I am sure it will be there in the 'Live' arena - I hope so because it's gonna be a real treat for the lovers of no-nonsense punkage.