1. So give us yer personal musical history man - I am always interested in where these melodic reprobates spring from. Bare all and inform us how ye got to being involved with The Jackhammers!
JIM SHIT: I've played in a buncha punk & garage bands over the years, including the Campus Tramps, the Grease Monkeys, the Social Lepers, a Black Flag covers band, The Neverland Sleepovers, and the Golden Guineas .....but this is the best one yet!
ANDY DRANKIT: Been playing punk drums now for 20 odd years. First met Jim '96 when I moved to Glasgow and a few years ago he asked me to play drums in his new venture The Jackhammers. I've been in a few bands with Horace over the years so he was a logical choice to be main axe man.
HORACE COCKPUPPET: I've wielded the axe in a few bands that imploded through laziness. I'd seen The Jackhammers play some shows and had some time off. Andy asked me to join and I was more than happy. We became four, then became the power trio you see today through some experimental breeding program/children of god that the old axe slinger joined.
2. Your chosen weapon of war - why that particular instrument and how do you go about making your identifiable noise - very sludgy?
JS: Bass & vocals, 'cos bass is easy & shouting's fun. Sludgy? ...what like stoner rock?!?
AD: Tried a few instruments - drums were the one I was best at so...
HC: 6 strings, feedback and reverb
3. How are you finding wandering this foul land and how does it compare with your local scene?
JS: We love getting outta town - it's great to land somewhere for the night, get messy & see what hi-jinks we can get up to. Because of the size of Glasgow, the punk scene's got quite a few sub-divisions that don't really mingle - we've played to them all & went down well 'cos they forgotten what undiluted action-packed punk rock's like.
HC: We love adventures, excitement and making new friends. Seek and Annoy! Glasgow is slowly waking up to the fact that rock ‘n’ roll is kool, but they are doing it all wrong, but Twee folkies and U2 guitar pedals rule the scene, so we gotta get out of town, and thankfully we found plenty of allies.
AD: What Jim said.
4. The best Jackhammers song and what makes it such a stand out number?
JS: I love 'em all .....in the way Screamin' Jay Hawkins loves all his illegitimate children. I wouldn't have written 'em & played 'em if I didn't like them!
AD: The newest one is usually my favourite till the next one!
HC: The fast one.
5. Morgan Flannel once broke through the fabric of time using a spring loaded bowler hat, 3 rubber legs and a strap on black lasses titty! Have you ever considered breaking through time, if so what era would you want to appear in and how do you think The Jackhammers would go down. Also would you swap one of your legs for a hollowed out glass one in which you could keep a swarm of anal flies!
JS: ...and now the first question of the interview written under the influence of psychedelic fungi! I'd want us to go back to just before the formation of all our favourite bands that we've been influenced by ....so we'd be revered as trailblazers, and get to hang out with & be mates with them!
And I'll stick with the legs I've got, thanks!
AD: The Seventies, and No! I wouldn't swap.
HC: I keep my flies on the front of my trousers.
6. The best bands you have played with, the best CD's in your collection, the best books you have read and the best and the worst of the punk scene?
JS: Best bands we've played with: Ricky C Quartet, Gin Goblins, Maximum Zeros, Shook-Ups, Legendary Shack Shakers, UK Subs, Slaves.
All my CDs & records are the best! ...or I wouldn't be owning them! Current listening includes Giuda, Raxola, Berlin Brats, the Kids, Consumers, LiveFastDie, CPC Gangbangs, Rings, Elton Motello, 45 Grave, Johnny Moped, etc. (mostly on vinyl)
Best books - "I Have Fun Everywhere I Go" by Mike Edison, "A Dead Boy's Tale" by Cheetah Chrome, and the Haynes Manual for the Vauxhall Astra '98-'04.
Best thing about the punk scene: the good times; Worst thing: the bad times.
AD: Best bands - Ricky C Quartet, Former Cell Mates, PTTB
Best CDs - This changes all the time but currently Gaza Strippers, Cock Sparrer, Masked Intruder, Wonk Unit
Best thing about the punk scene - the young 'uns
Worst thing about the punk scene - the old 'uns
HC: Best bands - Ricky C Quartet, Endless Grinning Skulls, Atomic Suplex, Dwarves, Murderburgers, Maximum Zeros, Legendary Shack Shakers, The Queers, Jackie Onassis (RIP), Kunt & The Gang, Six Pack ....and not one of them blew us offstage.
Best records - The Spits, Bo Diddley, Red Mass, Giuda, Cleavers, Cyanide Pills, Little Richard, Dan Sartain, Mark Sultan, Livefastdie, DC Snipers
Best Books - 50 Great Coastal Walks Of The British Isles: Volume 2.
7. What inspires you to get up and play - what is that inner driving force and why in the punk pit that is so fractured?
JS: We're inspired by mediocrity, boredom and stupidity
HC: Going to a show and being bored to tears, makes me wanna show 'em how it's done.
8. I drew a cartoon elephant, it came to life and ate my trousers, the elephant took a dump and the trousers came back out, a darker shade of brown with a pot smoking chimpanzee inside them. The chimps name was Carl, he was an intellect. Carl explained to me the meaning of life - I like clever monkeys! The question is threefold - a/ Have you ever taken a shit and passed something extraordinary b/ What is the most intellectual thing you have ever said c/ would you nob a primate for a free ride on a Jimmy Saville inflatable corpse?
JS: I know Carl the chimp - he lives in Liverpool.
(a) I took a dump in a Megabus toilet one time while it was overtaking a circus convoy.
(b)"Ich bin ein arshloch"
(c)That's a very tempting reward, but I'd have to know and respect the primate first before I "nobbed" it.
AD: (a) The first time I drank a bottle of red wine the next day my shit was black and I was freakin out asking my flatmates to look at it - they laughed!
(b) "That is a completely ridiculous request" upon being told I couldn't smoke a joint either out the back door or the front door or in the house while crashing at Caroline Servo's house after a gig. I did anyway once they went to bed!
HC: I once sharted whilst taking my music highers.
9. The sound you make is of a brutal essence, is this pre-planned or a natural occurrence. Also how do you compose your songs - hard work, easy come, easy go or just sheer luck?
JS: All of the above.
AD: We all like to make a good noise and are all pretty much on the same page.
10. Old school vs new school punkage - which is best and why?
JS: The best punk rock didn't go to school. This old/new school thing was invented by NY thrash metal bands that aspired to hardcore - rather tedious.
HC: The best new bands rip off the best old band you have never heard, or they fix the mistakes.
11. If you could organise your own gig with any bands which 8 would you have on it, why and where would it be?
JS: I presume you mean bands that currently exist? If so, the Jackhammers, Cyanide Pills, Radio Birdman, the Kids, The Spits, Poison Idea, King Salami & the Cumberland Three, and Giuda. I'd have it somewhere warm and sunny with cheap/free booze and a laissez-faire approach to drug law enforcement. ....and why not?!
AD: I'd like to go to Jim's gig!
12. Finally Jack off yer Hammer man - go for it - persuade us that this unit is the real deal!
JS: We deal in undiluted action-packed punk rock. Our aim is to have a shitload of fun by any means necessary. You're welcome to join in ....or you can just keep on looking stupid.
And thanks Dave - for making me have to think!
HC: We are punk rock cavemen from Troglodyte city baby, we are sick of shit, you better listen up or you're gonna be left behind.
AD: Book us to play your town/city. Seeing us live should be all the persuadin' you need.